Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Anecdote I'm Sure You'll Find Hilarious

I decided to finally go through and finish the DLC for Penny Arcade's On The Rain Slick Precipice of Darkness: Episode 3. I had originally started playing it on my old PC, but when the caught fire again I decided it was time to retire the ol' gal and it took a while before I could work up the courage to try OTRSPoD: The Beginning of the End. I'm kidding, it's really more the idea of using my laptop to play video games is a horrifying thought because it precludes the option to use my computer to surf for none of your business. 

So I boot up OTRSPoD 3 on my computer, and sure enough, the DLC is available right from the menu. No need to play through the campaign and it doesn't require any save information from previous play-throughs to run a competitive character. Feeling cocky, I snap it into "insane" mode, and start playing.

I immediately lose the first fight. In fact, during the whole trek through the initial play area, I only win two of the eight-ish fights on the first try, and in several of the battles, I die before Tycho can even take his second turn. I'm sure a hardcore RPG player or an unemployed person could figure out how to win these battles on "insane" but after four losses on what should clearly be an easy battle I give up and turn the challenge back down to veteran. These fights still require something of a correct order to win, but it's not so punishing that the wrong move screws your entire fight and forces you to sit helplessly at one HP while four enemies buff themselves to deliver a truly punishing onslaught to your tenderized hindquarters.

Finally, I've gotten to a place where I can consistently win battles, and Tycho learns a new spell: Overkill. The spell description claims it "Uses all your remaining MP to cast a powerful Darkness spell." Alright, I think, I have four MP, let's cast this spell. I cast in, and my screen goes black. Hey, that's pretty clever. It's a darkness spell so potent it even shuts off the game's GUI! And it turns off the music. That's pretty funny, but it's been like ten seconds. Alright, a minute. How long is this attack animation? Why can't I access the menus or even ESC out?

Oh. My battery died.

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